Today, I realised, why have i believed in god all these years? I wonder, how can i always say: 'god help me!' when i have never ever seen him, and his existence is not proven...
I have never ever found someone to really confide into, I want help. I want a pair of ears to really listen, but no... I find that trusting is too hard... i can't share my problems as easily as i thought i would... no... It is so tormenting to try to cry it out, but not show it, just store all these hatred, sorrow, angst inside me. Not that i appear to be a very sad person, it is just a false front, you see me laugh, smile, play... but, it's a tough war inside...why must my life seem more miserable than some? i am not the most miserable on earth, but i am feeling so miserable... I want to be happy inside not just the outside.
Why must i have people to come and mess up my life...Please stop messing my life up... please, stop all these prejudices. i really want to be a boy.Please, treat me like your daugther, please be the grandmother i've always read about in stories, please UNDERSTAND ME.Please, be fair. Please, stop messing up my life. give me my space...just leave me alone, let me cry alone.
but,
Please, God, save me... take all these miseries away... It's just so hard to be myself.[if only God will take these miseries away]
when i grow up, i want to leave these miseries. I wanto to leave them where they belong, and i will find a place where i belong... ;D
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment